September 30, 2011

Wanna buy my Falcons tickets?

My little brother can't make it to this Sunday's game, so I'm looking to sell my Seahawks v Falcons tickets- The above picture is the view from my seats in section 325. The face value of the pair is $86, but I'll be honest: I'll probably take the first semi-respectable offer from someone that can pay via PayPal.

If we can reach agreement on price, I will email you the tickets for you to print out on your end once I receive payment. If you have questions you can leave them as comments here, or email me at dksb17 @ gmail dot com.

Proceeds will go to the "DKSB buying tickets to the Seahawks game in Cleveland October 23" fund.

September 27, 2011

Seahawks 13, Cardinals 10

My weekend trip out west to see family, friends and the Seahawks got off to a rough start at the Flint, MI airport. Here's what the TSA guy said when he saw my Seahawks cap:

"Seahawks? PFFT. Why the hell did you guys sign Tarvaris?"

So it began- I tried to explain the reasoning behind the move while taking off my shoes and getting out my ziplock baggie of various liquids, but he wasn't really buying it. Then were the acquaintances at my friend's birthday party in Seattle Saturday night, who were unanimously incredulous when I told them the Seahawks would beat the Cardinals. The pessimism about the Seahawks is a national pandemic- from casual observers thousands of miles away to the very nerve-center of the Twelve Army.

There was a lone hopeful event that boosted my spirits, however- Given that my only Seahawks jersey was a Matt Hasselbeck model, I needed to get a new one on my visit out to Seattle. I decided that I would take advantage of the deal being offered at the Seahawks Stadium Pro Shop: Turn in any old Seahawks jersey and get 25% off a new one. For me, that meant I'd have to part with my #8, and give up the dream that I'd wear it someday to his Ring of Honor ceremony. It was a sad thing to contemplate, but given that I'm not exactly flush with cash right now, it seemed like a necessary sacrifice.

That was until my close friend Katie stepped in and said (as I remember it) "No way. You LOVED Hasselbeck, and I remember you defending him when I was crapping all over him- You explained to me what he meant to this team- There's no way I'm letting you trade that in."

She offered up her own old Julius Jones jersey, and I ended up getting my SWEET new Earl Thomas jersey at a discounted price. She also reminded me that blind optimism is pretty much my best quality as a Seahawks fan- Her gesture re-energized me for Sunday's game.

I showed up in my "I'm Calling it Seahawks Stadium" t-shirt (which got dozens of reactions from people- every one positive and many asking how they could get one) with my little brother James (Who KICKED ASS for Kamiakin in their HUGE 14-6 win over arch-rival Kennewick), ready to use every decibel I could muster to help drag the Seahawks to victory.

I've been to 18 games at Seahawks Stadium, and by far this was the SURLIEST crowd I've ever been a part of. The "Char-Lie!" chants started up in my part of the stadium with Jackson's first incompletion, and just intensified with every subsequent sack or missed target. A dude in front of me tried to start an "Andrew Luck" chant, but thankfully that didn't catch on. Amazingly, boos cascaded down upon the Seahawks as they left the field at half-time, down by a whopping four points.

Here's what I don't get: It's universally "known" that this is a VERY young team in rebuilding mode. Why, for the love of fuck, would you BOO them? I'd never boo the Seahawks, but I can sorta see booing a team like the 2009s, who just fucking gave up with a month left in the season. These guys are playing hard and learning tough lessons- They are kids on the uptick, not a veteran-laden group laying down on the job. My point? Don't boo your own fuckin' team, assholes!

Strangely, when the offense starting moving the ball in the second half, and Jackson sacrificed his body to put the Seahawks in front with a gritty TD scramble, there were no "T-Jack" chants. Look, I know the guy is never going to be a Pro Bowler, and if he craps out badly the next two weeks, it's probably Beef Supreme time after the bye... But Seahawks fans should at least give the dude credit for his toughness and leadership ability, and I still think he can lead us to an NFC West title if the O-line improves and Sidney Rice can stay healthy.

The big story was Seattle's rapidly developing defense, led by fierce young safeties Thomas and Kam Chancellor. The Hawks already have the best defense in the NFC West, and sooner rather than later could have one of the best defensive units in the NFL (and "sooner" might be later THIS season). Thomas and Chancellor set the tone from the start with controlled, vicious brutality, and the rest of the D is following their lead- Be excited, Twelves... You have a great young defense.

Despite the "Char-Lie" chants and the boos, the Twelve Army still rained intolerable noise upon the Arizona Cardinals, and I can forgive a lot of transgressions by fellow fans if they are still punishing opposing offenses like that- In the end, we all got to go home happy, and our team is still very much alive in a weak NFC West.

Seriously- Tell me why we CAN'T repeat as division champs. We will improve as the season goes on... Hell, we might even beat a staggering Atlanta squad this Sunday. No one else in the division is going to run away with this- as I said before, I STILL expect the Seahawks to be alive in the NFC West race going into those final two against SF and AZ. Eight wins WILL be enough to win the West for sure, and seven might just do it again.

Know hope, Twelves- Not just for 2012 and beyond, but for next week and next month. We can rebuild AND win.

What do you think, sirs?

September 23, 2011

A Brief Word From Your Author

One of the secrets of good blogging? Differentiation. No one wants to go somewhere and read the same groupthink pieces they can see anywhere else. People want to see original content from a unique point of view (at least, that's what I tell myself to justify the continuing existence of this blog). With this principle in mind, I'm letting everyone know this right now: I won't be talking about the 2012 draft until the 2011 season is over- and I don't mean "over" in terms of mathematical elimination or some sort of conventional wisdom that "it's over."

I mean the earliest you will see me talk about the 2012 draft on this blog is after time runs out on the last Seahawks game of the 2011 season. You can go to dozens of other places online and see speculation about where the Seahawks might draft and who they might select- There is nothing I can add to this discussion other than angry spittle and vitriol, so I am disengaging from it (I reserve the right to go on the occassional twitter rampage on this topic, but I am not going to rehash it over and over on these pages).

So if you want to read about and discuss the 2011 season as it is happening, you'll get a LOT of that here- If you want to talk about how we should "Suck for Luck" or other such drivel, I will kindly ask you to take it elsewhere.

Keep an eye over on the ol' twitter account this Sunday- I will be tweeting live from Seahawks Stadium before, during and after our glorious victory over the Arizona Cardinals.

What do you think, sirs?

September 20, 2011

September 19, 2011

Tomorrow Doesn't Have to be Like Yesterday


The Seahawks sucked Sunday. If you want to read about that game, here's a great breakdown of it. The Seahawks are 0-2. Things are bad.

That DOESN'T mean that the Seahawks are the worst team in the NFL, or that they are going to go 0-16, or that Pete Carroll should be fired, or that the team should pack its bags and join the former Sonics in Oklahoma. It means simply that the Seahawks have dropped two road games and looked pretty terrible in the process. Seattle fans SHOULD be concerned, and we should be looking at Sunday's home opener against Arizona as an absolute must-win game (and be accordingly ear-splittingly loud).

What bothers me (OK, pisses me off) are the legions of Seahawks fans who are instantly assuming that these two games are absolutely representative of how the team will play this season- An unalterable, immutable fact- Like water being wet or your skeleton being inside your body. When faced with an outsider or the national football press stating "the Seahawks suck," they don't jump up and go "Fuck you!" They meekly slump their shoulders and mumble "yeah, I guess so."

Yes, the Seahawks are off to a bad start- But NO NFC West team has won a road game yet, and unless the Niners can win at Cincinnati next Sunday, a win over Arizona will move the Seahawks into a tie for 1st place in the division. That would hardly be a hopeless, forlorn position for us to be in a week from now.

Here's a bigger, perhaps unbridgeable, philosophical divide between myself and a LOT of other Seahawks fans- Remember that Simpsons episode where they went camping and Homer, Bart, Ned and his kids end up lost at sea? Homer is all negative and fatalistic, while Flanders tries to keep everyone's morale up. When a point comes where Homer's pessimism seems to be proven right, he yells: "You see, Bart? Your old man was right! We ARE doomed! In your face, Flanders!!!" I feel like a lot of Seahawks fans, after TWO WEEKS, have already retreated into this dank cone of destitute despair, and I don't get that at all- As long as the team still has a pulse, I HAVE TO believe they have a chance. What are you going to say to that? "Fuck you, DKSB! We ARE doomed!" Bully for you, I guess?

And they DO still have a chance to win this division. In franchise history, the team has started 0-2 twelve times in 16-game seasons. In EIGHT of those seasons, they've bounced back and finished 7-9 or better. Eight times they've been in this exact position and climbed out of that hole to at least be semi-respectable (and let's face it: 8 wins will be enough to take the NFC West title this season).

I'm pumping out sunshine, right? But here's the scary reality: If we lose Sunday it IS over for this season. An 0-3 start is bad enough, but 0-2 in the division, including a home divisional loss? Hard to see how you can win the West pulling that shit. Not only do the Seahawks need to play their best game Sunday, WE need to have our best game as fans- If you're coming to Seahawks Stadium looking for an excuse to boo our team, stay the fuck home. We've only got room for Mean Motherfuckin' Soldiers of Twelve this Sunday- Folks ready to blow out their vocal chords to help give Kevin Kolb fuckin' Tinnitus.

I'll be at the game Sunday, and a loss aint gonna happen on my watch, mofos.

What do you think, sirs? Who is with me? Plenty of leg-room on this bandwagon right now...

September 13, 2011

"You can't give back what you've taken from me."

That's what Nic Cage says to Travolta in Face/Off, after the dastardly Castor Troy (wearing Sean Archer's face), offers to switch faces and go back to the previous status quo... This is also EXACTLY how I feel about Super Bowl XL, and it also colors how I am approaching Sunday's game at Pittsburgh.

I've talked about XL in great detail on this blog before, so I don't think I need to rehash everything- But the bottom line is while I'd LOVE to see the Seahawks win on Sunday, this upcoming game will have NO impact on how I feel about what happened in Super Bowl XL.

First of all, while this would be a huge win for the Seahawks (kinda like last season's regular-season win at Chicago, but bigger), there's NO "revenge factor" for Seattle here- Only Leroy Hill and Lofa Tatupu Marcus Trufant remain from the 2005 Seahawks- Other than those two guys, the ENTIRE Seattle organization (expect for Paul Allen) has radically been remade since XL.

Secondly, NOTHING the Seahawks do to the Steelers on Sunday could take away the deep, gnawing, nauseating pain of XL. Even if the Seahawks won 63-0, grievously injured every Steelers player who participated in XL, strung Bill Leavy up on the goalpost by his underpants, and then burned Heinz Field down to the fucking ground IT WOULDN'T MAKE ME FEEL ANY BETTER ABOUT XL. Even if we stole the goddamn trophy and the NFL agreed to let us keep it, that still wouldn't ease the pain of that pitch-black fucking day. Only one thing can: A Seahawks player and/or coach hoisting the Lombardi Trophy in a confetti storm. That's it. Until then, the XL wound will not- CANNOT- close for me... and nothing that happens Sunday will move that needle one direction or the other.

WARNING: RED SOX CONTENT AHEAD

A LOT of terrible things happened to me as a Red Sox fan from 1986-2003 (Buckner, playoff sweeps, Aaron Fucking Boone, etc).. But the INSTANT that they recorded the final out of the 2004 World Series ALL of that pain went away FOREVER. Now seeing the ball roll through Buckner's legs or watching Boone's homer has absolutely no effect on me, whereas before 2004 I would have averted my eyes to stem a panic attack before it started.

Once the Seahawks win a Super Bowl (and they WILL), then I will feel the same way about XL- "Hey, that sucked- But look at this glittering Lombardi Trophy! Ahhhhhh..." Until then, I'll have to quarantine myself from XL footage and limit my interactions with Pittsburgh fans to the absolute bare minimum- It's the only way to maintain my tenuous grip on sanity.

About Leavy officiating this game: I don't like it, but I'm more perplexed by it than anything. Why would the NFL INVITE a full week of XL rehashing in the run-up to this game by assigning it to Leavy? For Leavy himself, this game is full-on Kobayashi Maru: If questionable calls go Pittsburgh's way? We'll all scream bloody murder, and it will simply reinforce the notion that he is inherently biased- for Pittsburgh, against Seattle, or both. If questionable calls go Seattle's way? Well, we'd all just say (and Pittsburgh fans would join us) that he's trying to "make-up" for XL. The fucker needs to call an almost perfect game to avoid tremendous blowback. I'm sure he's THRILLED with The Rog right now.

Obviously, winning this Sunday would be WAY better than losing- But don't kid yourselves... Even a win won't make us feel any better about XL. And if we lose? It's the best kind of loss: A non-conference loss (and if those Yinzer fucktards also beat the Niners, Cardinals and Rams? It all cancels out, doesn't it?).

What do you think, sirs?

September 11, 2011

49ers 33, Seahawks 17

Remember how everyone said our win over the Chargers last year was "lucky" because we scored two "fluky" touchdowns on Leon Washington kick returns? I ranted and raved at those fuckers, proclaiming that special teams is every bit as important and legitimate as offense or defense.

So don't go around saying that the Niners got "lucky" on those two Ted Ginn Jr. TDs- Our special teams catastrophically failed on those plays, and cost the rest of the team a chance to prevail in an imminently winnable game. People who didn't watch the game will see the score and think "Wow. Those shitty-ass Sea Chickens got blowed out just like I thought they would. Hyuk-hyuk!" We know the truth. The Niners were perilously close to blowing a 16-point half-time lead- and if our kick coverage teams had done their job, our defense probably at least gives Tarvaris Jackson a chance to drive the team into position to win the game.

For all of the flaws in Seattle's performance today, this one was a missed opportunity- A game they could have and SHOULD have won. The good news is that the defense appears to be on the verge of being a very dangerous unit- Earl Thomas is laying down evidence that he'll soon be one of the best safties in the NFL, and the run defense already looks impressively stout. Particularly with the noise and energy of the Twelve Army behind them at Seahawks Stadium, this defense could almost win games on their own.

The offense seemed to grow in the space of a single game, going from absolutely 1992-level atrocious to downright competent in the 2nd half. Tarvaris Jackson improved as the game went on and showed that he can be dangerous if kept "clean." He'll never be an All-Pro, but as the pass protection improves (and with Sidney Rice on the field), T-Jack can be an effective, maybe even slightly-above average NFL QB. To just lay down this marker: No, he wasn't nearly bad enough to justify Whitehurst taking his starting job. Yet.

I liked the commitment Bevell showed to running the ball, even if it didn't pay great dividends today. Doug Baldwin was a standout on offense, I found Marshawn Lynch's aggressive style inspiring yet again, and it was nice to see Golden Tate find the end zone. 17-24 points is about what we can expect the offense to put up on the board on a week-to-week basis. We aren't going to win a lot of shootouts.

That means that we need not only excellent defense (which we largely got today), but we also need the special teams to at least NOT TOTALLY FUCK US UP. Ideally, they'll dominate games like they did many times in 2010. Giving up TDs? We aren't going to win many games when they do that.

It's pretty simple. The Seahawks will win with competent offense, great defense, great special teams, and winning the turnover battle. We only had 1.5 out of 4 of those today, at best. The good news is that the flaws we saw today should fade away as the team gets healthier and gains experience. This team is going to win plenty of games this year (and yes, they might even win next week).

Even if the Seahawks come away with a loss at Pittsburgh next week, it won't be time to panic unless we lose at home to Arizona in Week 3. The Rams are battered and face a daunting early season schedule- They won't run away with this division. The Cardinals just barely beat the Panthers at home, so I'm not exactly terrified of those jokers.

The Niners? Fuck em. We'll get payback on Xmas Eve. No doubt about it.

This isn't a time for despair. The Seahawks WILL get things going in the right direction, and sooner than a lot of people think.

What do you think, sirs?

September 8, 2011

You and Whose Army? - My 2001 Seattle Seahawks Story


Millions of people found their own ways to cope in the dark days after the 9/11 attacks, and my thin tether to sanity was, yet again, the Seahawks. Every week I'd endure the indignities of being the only Seahawks fan at some noisy, overpriced sports bar, but it was worth it- as Homer Simpson once said, it was a break from "stupid reality."

Those 2001 Seahawks were a transitional crew- Long removed from the talented-but-underachieving Erickson Hawks, and not yet the seasoned, veteran crew that would dominate the NFC West through the middle of the decade. Matt Hasselbeck wasn't really "Matt Hasselbeck" yet- Trent Dilfer only started four games, but it feels like he started more because he won all four of his starts, most in memorable fashion.

We got our first real look at how amazing Alexander, Hutchinson and Big Walt could be together- and we also got to see a break-out season from WR Darrell Jackson. The defense was led by Chad Brown and free agent pick-up (and Pro Bowler) John Randle, and on special teams Seattle had an elite kick return specialist in Charlie Rogers. In the end, they just barely missed the playoffs, but helped me make it through a terrible stretch in my life- Here's my 2001 Seahawks story.

On September 9th, 2001 I went to the Seahawks Kickoff Weekend opener against the Browns in Cleveland, sporting my shiny new Hasselbeck jersey. It was a brilliant, sunny Ohio day, and as soon as my fiance and I approached Cleveland Browns Stadium in Seahawks gear we were serenaded with chants of "Assholes! Assholes!" That went on all afternoon, with my lady getting a free pass from the abuse because she was wearing my Shawn Springs jersey ("Oh, she's OK, Shawn Springs is a Buckeye!" Welcome to Ohio, kids). I was called Hasseldick, Asselbeck, and worse. Before the game, most of the sellout crowd LUSTILY booed President Bush as he flipped the coin via satellite from the White House. In many ways, it was just a bad, ugly scene.

The game itself was a snoozer until the final moments. The Browns tied the game at 6 with just seconds left, but Rogers returned the kick into Cleveland territory. With only time for a FG attempt, Rian Lindell nailed a 52-yarder with no time on the clock- I exploded in celebration, first bellowing "Rian Lindell is a GOD!" and then mocking Browns fans as they filed out in defeat. As we left the stadium we passed Bernie Kosar signing autographs- I SWEAR he saw us, noticed our Seahawks gear and gave us an all-time-great dirty look. It was AWESOME. After checking out the Rock and Roll Hall of Fame (which isn't nearly as cool as the EMP), we walked to our car parked blocks away... The people that didn't give us the finger or curse at us fucking BARKED at us. It was unreal, and inspired me to HUG another Seahawks fan I saw on the street and howl "Seahawks, MOTHERFUCKERS! YEAH!"

The next day I'd get on a plane to Pasco, WA- The plan was I'd go out and visit my friends and family in the Tri-Cities & Seattle, and I'd catch the Seahawks home opener the next Sunday at Husky Stadium before returning home. I got to my parents' house in Kennewick late the night of the 10th and went straight to bed- We all know what happened next...

Strangely, I woke up on my own about 6 am, and turned on the TV, which was on the Weather Channel- They were talking about air traffic being grounded because of something happening in New York. Partially because I had only gotten a few hours of sleep, I was deeply confused. Then my fiance called me and told me to turn on CNN- Just in time to witness the 2nd plane impact the World Trade Center. I watched the towers collapse with my parents and little brother in stunned silence. It didn't dawn on me immediately that I had just watched 3000 people die- Like billions around the globe, I didn't know how to mentally process such an evil act of mass murder.

I spent that week in haze of confusion, anger and depression. I still went to Seattle to visit my friends from Western, but everything was muted. We had no idea what would happen next, and fear was still heavy in the air. The NFL understandably postponed Week 2, but it was still a gut-punch for me. I REALLY needed a Seahawks game to watch that Sunday. Air travel resumed just in time for me to return to Ohio as scheduled, and as I began my 3rd year in the Ohio State PhD program, I was adrift.

So were the Seahawks, apparently- When the NFL resumed play, they promptly lost two games in blowout fashion. It was so bad that an SI article after the Eagles game wondered if Mike Holmgren had lost control of the Seahawks locker room. In reality, the Seahawks were in the middle of a mini-1985. For two months, they alternated two-game winning streaks with two-game losing streaks. The most memorable moment from that stretch was an ESPN SNF win over Oakland, in which Shaun Alexander exploded for 266 yards and 3 TDs- In November, the Seahawks actually became MORE inconsistent, going L-W-L-W-L until finally ending up at 7-7 going into the final fortnight of the season.

At this point, I returned home for Xmas break and Trent Dilfer took over at Quarterback for the Seahawks. One of my all-time favorite Seahawks moments came in a must-win week 16 game at San Diego. In an odd echo of the season-opening win at Cleveland, the Seahawks allowed the Chargers to tie the game with only seconds left. Once again, Charlie Rogers fielded the kickoff and blazed a trail down the sidelines- As my whole family was screaming "GO CHARLIE ROGERS! GO CHARLIE ROGERS!" he returned the ball into SD territory with enough time for a long field goal attempt. This time from 54(!) Lindell's kick was true and the Seahawks' playoff hopes were still alive.

Now I would get to go to the game I was originally set to catch back in week 2- and the playoffs were on the line. We needed to win, and then we needed either the Raiders to beat the Jets or the Vikings (on Monday Night) to beat the Ravens. It was the most intolerable weather I've ever sat through at an NFL game. Heavy sideways needle rain, wind gusts, temps in the 30s- WAY worse than simple cold or snow. Thankfully the Seahawks jumped out to a 14-0 halftime lead and held on for a 21-18 win, but late in the game word spread- John Hall hit a ridiculous long FG and the Jets pulled out a win over Oakland. That meant we needed Minnesota to pull out an upset win at Baltimore on Monday Night to make the playoffs.

I traveled east all day that Monday, just in time to get home and experience the slow, torturous demise of the Seahawks' season. Despite having to roll Spergon Wynn out at QB, the Vikings hung with Ravens for a while- But that false hope evaporated when the formidable Ravens defense realized that they were facing... Spergon Wynn.

Despite the ultimate failure of the 2001 Seahawks, they gave us competitive, meaningful football to watch in the awful months after 9/11- Every Seahawks fan who remembers that season is still grateful to have had that distraction.

What do you think, sirs?

BONUS- The Radiohead song that I named this post after:

September 4, 2011

Predictions for the 2011 Seahawks

My 2010 predictions were far from perfect, but hey- I did correctly predict an NFC West title, and a home playoff win before elimination in the divisional playoffs... That's gotta count for something, right? There's a lot of pessimism and negativity about the Seahawks floating around out there- Shit tons of publications are picking us to finish dead-last in the division, and even "respectable" opinion among Seahawks fans is that 2011 is to be a forlorn, doomed season.

Guess what? They're ALL fucking wrong. THIS is what is going to go down. Here we go with my 2011 predictions for the Seattle Seahawks...

The Lead: The Seahawks finish 8-8, and win the NFC West based on holding the tiebreaker over the 8-8 Cardinals (5-1 v 3-3 divisional record). They host the Tampa Bay Buccaneers in the NFC Wild Card game, and once again the Seahawks are given NO chance against a "better" 11-5 NFC South team- They win (details below), and finally fall in the divisional playoffs at New Orleans, who exact some revenge for the Beastquake.

Postseason awards/Pro Bowlers: None. This will once again fuel blasts of disbelieving rage from all corners of the media- Once again, the nondescript, "uninteresting" Seahawks will sneak into the playoffs over teams that attracted more media "buzz," and then beat an up-and-coming squad in the playoffs. Man, the nattering nabobs of negativity are going to be PISSED. Despite all that, the Seahawks will continue improving, and steal another division crown along the way.

Team MVP: Russell Okung. The Seahawks offense ends up being mediocre rather than horrendously unwatchable, and does JUST ENOUGH to keep an quickly-improving defense fresh, rested, and effective. The biggest reason for this unexpected triumph will be the play of Russell Okung, who will keep Tarvaris Jackson "clean" enough to meet my "be as good as 1999 Jon Kitna" goal- With decent protection, T-Jack finds he has numerous (and dangerous) targets. While no Seahawks WR or TE has a 1000-yard season, Rice, BMW and Miller all come close. Jackson's stats for 2011: 283/479 for 3150 yards, with 22 TDs/15 INTs (Rating: 80.9)

Okung's play will not just allow Jackson to exceed expectations, it will also help the running game control the tempo and grind down opponents. No Seahawks RB will gain 1000 yards, but Lynch, Washington and Forsett will create an effective overall ground game. Without a healthy Russell Okung, playing at an (unrecognized) All-Pro level, none of this could happen.

MVP honorable mentions: Earl Thomas, Brandon Mebane, Leon Washington, Red Bryant, Sidney Rice

Season highlights:

Week 1- Seahawks 24, 49ers 10
For the second year in a row, it's a kickoff weekend win over the 49ers that sets the tone for a successful season. The defense forces 5 turnovers, including a scoop-and-score TD from Aaron Curry. Seahawks fans are also tantalized by a 65-yard T-Jack-to-Rice TD bomb, and the Niners' annual death spiral starts early on- Again.

Week 3- Seahawks 27, Cardinals 17
In the home opener, the Seattle defense sacks Kevin Kolb 6 times, and intercepts him twice. Zach Miller finds the end zone twice, and Leon Washington seals the win with a punt return TD midway through the 4th.

Week 11- Seahawks 20, Rams 19
The Seahawks arrive in St. Louis at 4-5, but in better shape than the surprisingly 3-6 Rams. STL comes out strong in what is pretty much a Death Match for them, building a 16-7 lead in the 3rd. Down 19-14 late, Tarvaris Jackson has his finest Seahawks moment so far: A 12-play, 80-yard drive for the winning TD, which is hauled in by BMW with only 18 seconds left to play. The subsequent 2-point try fails, but the Seahawks keep their playoff dreams alive (and effectively smother STL's).

Week 16- Seahawks 31, 49ers 14
The NFC West gets another round of crap thrown at it by the national press on Xmas Eve: If the 7-7 Seahawks defeat the 3-11 49ers, they will clinch the division with a week left to play. In front of 66,000 Twelves ready to watch them fill SF's stockings with coal, Seattle doesn't disappoint. Colin Kaepernick has a nightmare afternoon- He throws three interceptions, absorbs five sacks and is eating chopped rubber all day long. With a big early lead, Carroll decides to grind it out- Lynch, Leon and J-Force combine for over 200 yards on the ground and Seattle wins its 5th NFC West crown in 7 years.

NFC Wild Card Game: Seahawks 23, Buccaneers 17 (OT)
The underdog Seahawks are (again) given no chance against a seemingly superior opponent. While the Buccaneers may be bound for glory, it won't happen in front of a rowdy Seahawks Stadium crowd, 3130 miles from home. Jackson avoids turnovers and manages to connect on a couple of deep strikes to Rice and BMW. Tampa won't go quietly, and with a gutty final drive capped by a clutch 50-yarder by Connor Barth, they tie the game and force OT.

Michael Koenen is the Bucs' new Punter/Kickoff specialist, a native Washingtonian and a WWU alum like me- His homecoming will be spoiled when he fails to blast the opening OT kickoff out of the end zone, however. Leon Washington returns it 101 yards for a touchdown, and the quickest overtime win in NFL playoff history.

There you have it- The future, inevitable and infallible. What do you think, sirs?