A few years ago, I realized that I was DEEPLY unhappy living as a man and I decided that I needed to transition and start living as a woman. It didn't come out of nowhere- Since I was 8 or 9 years old, I have felt “different” and for a LONG time, that was it. Something was wrong, but I didn’t have a name for it. I battled severe anxiety and depression for years. I tried therapy, I tried Zoloft, etc. Nothing worked. But once I started taking steps towards transitioning from male to female, I wasn’t miserable any more. For the first time, I had real hope for the future, rather than a nebulous hope that following the social script handed to me from birth would work out somehow in the end.
About at year ago, I saw a doctor who pronounced me fit and gave me a prescription for Hormone Replacement Therapy, which I've been on since then. It’s a combination of estrogen and testosterone-blocking drugs that will, over time, change my appearance substantially. More importantly, they have almost completely eliminated the depression and anxiety I have been burdened with for decades. I am more relaxed and happier than I've ever been at any other time in my life. I’m also undergoing laser hair removal to eliminate my facial hair.
I’m intentionally taking a “slow-and-steady” approach to this process, and I intend to keep my given name, only changing the spelling slightly. It’s important for all of you to know that I’m not becoming a different person- I’m just becoming a happier, more well-adjusted one. My personality and interests won’t change. I will still love the Seahawks, I'll still nerd out about movies, TV, politics, and I'll still be with my incredibly wonderful and supportive girlfriend, who has been 100% behind my transition since the day we met. This has always been something I have struggled with mightily, and confronting it is one of the best decisions I've ever made in my life.
Why am I announcing this on my blog? I'm hoping for support and encouragement- If you can't give that to me, I'd prefer that you keep those feelings to yourself. I'm coming out to an ever-growing circle of people over time, and it just feels like the right time to come out to my fellow Twelves. I'm still not officially out in terms of my job or day-to-day life yet, and I hope all of you respect that decision, as well as my privacy. Finally, this is your chance to ask (respectful) questions (within reason) about what I'm doing and what my plans are, if you'd like.
Thanks for reading, and thanks in advance for your support.