June 16, 2010

Pre-DKSB Re-Run: "Many of my fellow Seahawks fans are insufferable douchebags."

This one is from my now-defunct personal blog (blame facebook), and it's from September 22, 2007, right before our dramatic 24-21 win over the Bengals... and I was there!

We would go on to win the NFC West, and beat DC in the Wild Card game. Matt Hasselbeck earned his third trip to the Pro Bowl... New annotations have been added as needed...

Let me preface the following rant by saying that the loyal core of Seahawks fans are amazing. They’re the ones who pack Qwest Field, who create the biggest home-field advantage in the NFL, and who have supported this team through the Dark Times of the 1990s. I am proud to count myself as a member of that cadre, whose members are finally enjoying the fruits of years of loyalty. This is the Golden Age of Seahawks football, and I’m trying to enjoy the ride as much as I can (even though watching them for three hours each week STILL makes me a little nauseous… Of all the things the Seahawks are to me, “relaxing” will never be one of them).


While I was waiting to board my flight west yesterday, the bluetooth-sporting, business-deal making middle-aged white guyin line behind me noticed my Seahawks cap. Here is the conversation, as I remember it:

Bluetooth: “I was at the game in Arizona last week. It was totally pathetic. They can’t put in Frye soon enough…”

Me: “You mean Charlie Frye? The guy we just picked up from Cleveland? He won’t be ready any time soon… and why would we want to bench Hasselbeck?” (who, for the record, is the greatest QB in franchise history)

BT: “That fumble was pathetic, plus, he won’t last the season. He’ll get hurt.”

Me: “One bad play aside, Hass is having a great season so far. Plus, if he gets hurt, it will be Seneca who goes in.” (Like I said, Pro Bowl)

BT: “He can’t even see over the offensive line. We need to put in Frye.”

I was totally agasht at this point, but I tried to keep it civil…

Me: “I’m going to the game in St. Louis later this season.”

BT: “Good luck with that. They have our number.”

Me: “We’ve won our LAST FOUR GAMES against them! They are 0-2. Orlando Pace is OUT FOR THE YEAR. We are going to KILL them.” (We did)

BT: “Maybe… but they usually find a way to screw it up.”

This is where I pop off..

Me: “Man, you are the most negative Seahawks fan I have EVER met” (I left out “stupidest”)

BT: “I’m a realist. I’ve had season tickets since day one, and they always find a way to screw up in the end.”

At this point, I was on the verge of punching this guy, but I let it drop, got on the plane, and stewed about it.

Fuck. I guess all teams have “fans” like this, but the Seahawks seem to have more than their share. Seriously: Take your negative attitudes and FUCK OFF. I haven’t even really mentioned the fact that Matt Hasselbeck has done more for this franchise than a stupid dicklicking fuckstick like you could ever fathom.

You don’t deserve to enjoy this team’s success. Get the fuck off the bandwagon, prick.


Laird of Madrona said...

I'm glad I wasn't there. I'd have ended up on the No Fly list, and that guy would have needed a proctologist to get his bluetooth back.

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