October 20, 2008

Project Mayhem

"It's only after we've lost everything that we're free to do anything."
-Tyler Durden

"And then, something happened. I let go. Lost in oblivion. Dark and silent and complete. I found freedom. Losing all hope was freedom."
-Narrator

At 1-5, the future looks like the "land of wind and ghosts." What can we do to bring any sort of meaning to this season? Destroy the hopes and dreams of others, that's what. Pull a Khan... activate the ol' Genesis device, and hope our opponents lack a Spock figure.

Each week is an opportunity to drag another team that much closer to our level of degraded hopelessness. Mike Singletary's first game as Niners coach? Let's send that bug-eyed bastage home 0-1. Let's get other coaches fired. Let's get other players cut. Let's make other fans weep as the feeble Seahawks ruin THEIR seasons too.

Let's salt the earth so nothing will ever grow again.

Let's be Space Monkeys.

"I felt like putting a bullet between the eyes of every Panda that wouldn't screw to save its species. I wanted to open the dump valves on oil tankers and smother all the French beaches I'd never see. I wanted to breathe smoke."
-Narrator

4 comments:

Hudson Hawk said...

Wow awesome post. Lets do some damage!

Cat Eating Alien said...

my question is, why the hell is the video of Ducket running over the ref nowhere to be found on the internet?

Anonymous said...

i agree. good post, good attitude. fuck em, kill em, and eat em!!!! go seahawks!!!

Anonymous said...

Lets destroy JT O'Sullivan to avenge that hit on Payne, knock out Bulger again, and just flat out kill Old Man Warner. Drag the rest of the NFC West down with us. You think we suck now, lets make sure no one finishes over 9-7.

Oh, and we NEED to at least injure Tony Romo or some cowboy starter, make ESPN realize that their favorite team, the cowboys, are just not that good.

Heres to you Zorn and Shaun, go out on top.