November 5, 2009

A Grim, Joyless Death March

This Sunday the Detroit Lions come to town, and while that's good news for a Seattle team that desperately needs a win, it's a rough assignment for the Twelve Army. Why?

This isn't a game anyone could possibly get excited about, because A) If the Seahawks win, even in blowout fashion, the collective reaction of the football world will be "so?" and B) If Seattle somehow loses, it would be an terrible, intensely embarrassing low-point in franchise history.

How low? Detroit hasn't won a road game in over two years. The Lions are 0-15 away from Ford Field since October 28, 2007. Not only would a loss on Sunday be humiliating and season-killing for the Seahawks, it would be a "Carrie at the prom" level embarrassment for the Twelve Army. Just think about it: How can we claim to provide a huge home field advantage if one of the worst road teams in NFL history wins at Qwest?

We came close to a loss this humiliating against 1-8 Miami in 2004, but Michael Boulware bailed us out with a late game-winning interception return TD. If Sunday's game is even a close win like that, it will be hard to whip up much hope for the rest of this season.

However, the best case scenario looks like this: Fading Kurt Warner throws a few more picks in an Arizona loss at Chicago... The Seahawks convincingly blow Detroit out, and Vince Young somehow rallies the Titans to an upset win at Candlestick. If that happens, next week's game in Glendale will be for 1st place in the NFC West.

Yup, despite everything traumatic and craptacular we've endured this season, we could be in first place 11 days from now. Unfortunately, that doesn't mean that watching the game on Sunday is going to be much fun, unless the Hawks run out to a big early lead and allow all of us to exhale a bit.

Those of you going to the game? You know the drill. Make Stafford's ears bleed. Lather. Rinse. Repeat.

Jeez. I'm making myself nauseous just thinking about this game.

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