November 23, 2009

Use Your Delusions

I've spent most of the last 24 hours in a haze of anger and depression, thinking about the draft, thinking about the idea of The Big Show returning, etc. You know what I've decided? I'm not ready to face stupid reality quite yet. For at least one more week, I'm more than willing to fool myself that there is something left to fight for this season. If you want to join me in the padded room, here's some ammo for you...

The Seahawks looked atrocious yesterday, but they were also playing a very formidable Super Bowl contender. This week? It's the 1-9 Rams, who haven't beat our guys since the 2004 NFC Wild Card game. A lot of you are so disgusted right now, that you think we won't even beat STL... Thankfully, you're wrong. Pfft, right? Who gives a shit? 4-7.

Ahh yes, but a week later, we come home to face the 49ers. After what happened back in week two, the Hawks BETTER be geeked for this one. Yes, Seattle is 2-4 over the last 6 games. The Niners? They're 1-5. As rough as things have looked this season, the Hawks have only served one outright crapburger at Qwest (the big loss to AZ). SF is a team we can and SHOULD beat at home. Ho hum. 5-7. Meh.

December 13 at the Texans, for our first trip to Houston since 1994. After two straight wins, the Seahawks have built up a bit of confidence... They catch the inconsistent Texans wallowing in complacency, and pull off an upset win. 6-7, and things are getting interesting.

The Hawks come home to play the Buccaneers. Tampa Bay stupidly fails to wear the creamsicle throwbacks, and the suddenly hot Seahawks (resplendent in the lime green alts) lay a beating on them. 7-7.

Then, it's at Lambeau on December 27th. The graveyard of Seattle playoff hopes many times before... Green Bay comes in 8-6 and fighting for their postseason lives, but Al Harris isn't around to pick off Hasselbeck, and the Hawks pull off another stunning upset. 8-7, and very much alive.

The regular season finale against Tennessee is a win-and-in scenario for Seattle. Qwest is rocking like it's 2005, and even the Vince Young-led, revitalized Titans don't stand a chance against the onslaught of the Hawks D and the twelve army. 9-7! The Seahawks squeeze into the 5th spot in the NFC playoffs, earning a Wild Card trip to.... Glendale, AZ to play the Cardinals.

Yes, it probably won't happen. But for at least one more week, it's theoretically possible, and I'm clinging to that like it's the last stimutax on Sealab.


Toftie said...

I love hope. Thanks for keeping it alive.

Hawkgirl said...

Love the blog but as my Texas mother in law says, "Bless your heart."

bleedshawkblue said...

I love it!

The playoff showdown against the Tards, knocking out Dirtyfilthy Dockett on the first offensive play from scrimmage (Housh catches it 12 yards deep and goes all the way for a classic YAC TD while Dockett gets a forearm shiver to the throat undetected by the officials), then knocking out Warner when he gets a high speed sandwich sack from Me! Bane! and Curry. Bringing in Beerbong Leinart to throw 5 interceptions, setting up Forsett to roll for 185 yards from scrimmage.

Final score:

Superhawks: 46
Fucktards: 3 on a meaningless last of the first half FG.

Told ya the Koolaid line starts here...

Pool Ninja said...

In one of the recent articles, you mentioned that you hope AZ loses in the Wild Card and to quote,

"I hope they get blown out in the Wild Card round, accompanied by a spectacular array of injuries."

can that be Seattle that causes this???

DKSB said...

Just win this next one game. We'll worry about the rest later.

MikeT said...

Love this kind of sh*t! Damn right we can win 6 in a row! You're either with us or against us. Now get in line and drink that Kool-Aid!!! GO HAWKS!!!

Zem said...

I love your optimism, but this team sucks.

If Holmy were manning the headset, I'd be more optimistic. Keep on keepin the faith.