July 24, 2008

Giant Head of Hasselbeck Tells DKSB: Wake Up. Time for Football.

At the Red Sox/Mariners game yesterday, I snapped that picture from my seat inside Safeco Field. It reminded me of the scene in Field of Dreams where Costner and Darth Vader go to Fenway and The Pee-Drinking Fish Man sees that message about Moonlight Graham on the jumbotron.

It was as if Bald Beck was telling me this:

"I feel you on the Red Sox stuff, DKSB. I'm a native New Englander, and I know the Sawx have always attracted bearded geeky academics from around the globe as well. As a fabulously wealthy man, I make it to Fenway when I can. I have MLB Extra Innings and watch many games on NESN-HD. I read Joy of Sox, Surviving Grady and Soxaholix. Let's Go Red Sox, Indeed.

But the time is nigh for you to focus. Not that you won't be into the pennant race or the playoffs, but training camp is about to start and the opener in Buffalo is just six weeks away... and you KNOW the Seahawks come first. I know that if a Red Sox game conflicts with a Seahawks game, you watch the Hawks and listen to the baseball on the radio. You can't fool me. I am the all-knowing Giant Head of Hasselbeck.

We're going to be taking care of business on the field. I expect you and your ilk to do the same. I expect you to represent. I expect you to defend the team's honor. And I expect you to leave any team visiting Qwest with bleeding ears and dazed expressions.

And yeah, Boston's first sweep in Seattle since 1993 was pretty sweet, huh?"

Accounts of my two trips to see the Sox play the M's can be read here and here.

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