January 27, 2009

Behold the Steelers Fan!

Nate, you are a great representative of your fanbase! Here's the comment "Nate" just attempted to post, in its entirety. His comment is in italics, my point-by-point responses are in the regular font.

Read and discuss, my friends!

So if officials are easily intimitaed by partisian crowds then why
don't home teams win evey week since obviously refs can't make
impartial decisions when home fans are screaming at them? Are you
retarted or is it just your beard?

My beard IS retarded.. I took it to a bunch of doctors, and unfortunately it suffers from RBS (retarded beard syndrome). I think you missed my point, in that SUPER BOWL crowds are almost NEVER partisan in the manner the XL crowd was. Hence, that atmosphere was UNEXPECTED. Plus, you may be interested in this: The little squiggly red lines mean a word you've written is misspelled. Spell Check! It's truly a great new invention.

It's my belief that you and whiney Hawks fans like you actually have
massive penis envy for all the Lombardi's the Steelers have accumulated
and will continue to accumulate starting this Sunday at 3pm. See the
real bitch about penis envy is that you can make all the statements you
want about the guy with the big cock, that he is gay, he shaves his
pubes to make it look bigger, he pays people to spread rumours about
how large it is, but at the end of the day it's just you and your tiny
dick blogging about a Superbowl loss that will never be your victory.

Penis envy? Really? I think even a Steelers fan can do better than that. I'm guessing you're the prime demo they pitch truck nutz at.

I actualy kinda feel sorry about you and your readers that grew up in
Seattle and were born a sports fan. 'Cause not sure if you noticed this
or not, but Seattle ain't a sports town. The mass populus here can give
a shit about sports. Don't believe me? Ask the local politicians who's
constituents dind't give a shit and let the Sonics leave. Plus KJR is
the only sports radio station here. Are you fucking kidding me?
Pittsburgh has 5. Hell every town I ever lived in had a least 2!
Seattle is the 14th biggest market supposedly, but it ain't a sports
market. So you and your beard are a dying breed here. It's pathetic.
Like watching a fish flop around on the beach looking for water.

A) I didn't grow up in Seattle.
B) I've never lived in Seattle.
C) I don't give a fuck about any other Seattle teams.
D) Didn't your QUARTERBACK have a beard in XL? Yup. He did. Dude looks awesome, too.
E) I don't care if Seattle is considered a good sports town or not. All I know Qwest Field is packed to the fucking brim every week, and has been since the mother fucker opened back in 2002.
F) If you'd rather live in Pittsburgh than Seattle... You sir, are an idiot.

So I hope you enjoy watching the Superbowl this Sunday, because no
matter who wins, you still lose. Steelers win and you'll have to hear
about how we are the greatest franchise in the NFL with more SB's than
anyone with the youngest Coach to win and the youngest QB to have 2.
That means more to come. If the Cards win then Seattle remains the only
team in the NFC West without one, with a new unproven coach in Mora, a
broke ass QB, sloppy defense and old ass WRs. Whew! Your sports life
sucks Mr. Beard. It's been nice writing to you, but I have to go now
and play with my big wang.


A) I'm a Red Sox fan since age 10... and I'm feeling pretty good about that. How about those Pirates, my friend?
B) I'm guessing you won't be showing your ass around here next year when the Hawks are back in the playoffs, huh?
C) You're going to go "play with your big wang?" Are you fucking 12? You should have gone the whole nine and called me a faggot or maybe a poopyface.

Steelers, your fans are priceless! You must be very proud of your sub-literate brood of mongoloid supporters.

1 comment:

Hernandez said...

Steelers fans are living proof of anal birth. This "Nate" fellow is a prime example.